Saturday, May 1, 2010

...

Right at this moment, i'm realizing the effect music has on me.
I'm feeling quite angsty at the moment, and I've been listening to Seether, Coheed and Cambria, Three Days Grace, Avenged Sevenfold, Blue October, Chevelle, and Muse since i've gotten out of work two hours ago.

I'm sure this isn't helping my crappy mood, but I can't help it.
Depending on my mood, I let music envelope me.

When i'm happy, it's danceable music. When i'm sad, it's mostly Bright Eyes. Angsty, like this... and I go back to goth-Amy.

I try to be positive, and I just can't.

Is something wrong with me? Or is everyone like this? I just decide that i'm going to be mad and I can't bring myself out of this.

Maybe I should just shuffle through and shut up.

-Amy Lee

Currently listening to (and want to cry my eyes out to): "I'm Broken" - Seether

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Barnes and Noble!

I'm blogging. From my iPod. Wee. I have nothing to say other than that. And I'm in Barnes and Noble.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

New look!

Hope everyone likes my new look on the blog.

Here's a random anecdote for you:
I usually pre-write my blog in a little journal that's decked out with these little owls. So i'm pretty excited that this template matches.

That's all i've got for you.

Look for a new post coming soon about rising teen pregnancy and why I love 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom!

New Music

Just a quick random post for you.

Some of my friends think that I have the weirdest taste in music. If you have the opprotunity to browse through my iPod or my collection on my computer, you'd probably look at me like i'm cracked. It goes through every single genre out there.

Lately though, i've gone from enjoying Blue October, Three Days Grace, Say Anything, Muse, and Coheed and Cambria to way too much Beach Boys, Jack Johnson, and a whole lot of Conor Oberst and Bright Eyes. A lot of the stuff my boyfriend introduced me to.

I really wonder what's responsible for the total opposite end of the spectrum switch.

In the meantime, I think that everyone should take a hypothetical trip to California in the 50's and 60's and listen to the Beach Boys..
Or check out Jack Johnson and Conor Oberst. ;)

Peace!

Currently listening to: "Sleep Through the Static" - Jack Johnson

Thursday, April 8, 2010

A Love-Filled History Lesson

Being polar opposites with someone may seem like a reason to not get to know someone, be their friend, or whatever else... but in my case, that phrase, polar opposites, is exactly how I would describe my current boyfriend.

Thad (check out his blog at www.thadsemporium.com) is essentially my exact opposite; a preppy, reclusive, as he says "elitist" of his old high school, and now strutting around his college campus in a series of button-down Hollister shirts and perfectly done hair only letting a few carefully chosen friends getting to know him well enough so they're not complete strangers - is my social opposite: I, on the other hand, a nerd, a gamer, a musician, singer, actress, the type of girl that's okay with rolling out of my bed, brushing her teeth/washing her face/tying up her hair, throwing on a t-shirt and sweat pants and leaving the house to see her battalion of "acquaintances" and small group of "best friends."

When we first met through a mutual friend, I had no idea that the kid that introduced himself to me with the ever-so-popular greeting of "Downtown Amy Brown! How's it goin'?" would ever become someone that it now seems... I need to live.

At that first meeting, I couldn't even figure out who... for lack of a better phrase, he was trying to be. He was cracking stupid jokes and comments to which no one was responding; except for me. I think the only thing pushing me on was the fact that he was pretty cute... or maybe I was just doing it to be nice. Either way, I kept laughing.

I guess from that brief meeting, he chose to add me on facebook, and I chose to write on his wall. With that initiated contact, he would leave me goofy comments all the time, and then eventually.... we both got the courage to obtain the others' cell phone numbers.

After a few.. not so great dates, we went to Barnes and Noble for coffee. Thad seemed - different some how. We had a great conversation, and then looked around through all the books. We talked about our favorite books and favorite writers and he was getting excited and happy, as far as I could tell. It was a side of him that I had yet to see, and i'm quite sure a lot of people that have known him longer than I have, have STILL yet to see. It's then that I realized that there was definitely something between us, and I could definitely see us together. From there, we set up another date. We went to the movies, to see Where the Wild Things Are. The movie did not hold our attention, we began to chat and flirt with each other, and soon enough... he kissed me. And with one last exchange:

"So... is this official now?" "I think so."

We've been together for five months, and already I can't see myself without him. I know that seems like a huge statement for a seventeen year old girl that's been making her life's decisions to make, but Thaddeus works well in whatever I choose to do.

Not many people seem to understand why we work so well together, and honestly... I can't explain it to you either. As he says (and wrote about in his blog) we DO have people in our social groups that would essentially work out. But we both don't care.
I can't explain to you my feelings for him, and if I tried I would probably just sigh and smile at you as if living in a day dream.

As i've portrayed this as if Thad and I are perfect; at times our differences do get the best of us, and we do fight. But it seems like every time this happens and we try to give the other the cold shoulder it will last for about five seconds before we both start nudging each other and constantly asking "What's your problem?" which just shows me that we're always willing to talk it out. And that fact, is something everyone in a relationship should try.

In the fall, Thad and I will be attending the same college with alike majors - as he just switched. Many people are already telling me that we won't last; considering the amount of time we'll be seeing each other. We're both willing to take this challenge because already, we try to see the other as much as possible. Days away from the other tend to become painful and feel empty, and we're both prone to spend many hours replaying past nights in our heads over and over again.

Sometimes, finding that person that it feels like you're "meant to be with" can last an entire life time. It could be painful, it could be hard. But love can turn up in the most unlikely places - with the most unlikely person. Keep trying, and don't give up.

And while you may be out there looking for it, try Barnes and Noble. You might even catch Thad and I sitting there, our hands clasped together in the middle of the table, enjoying one of our trademark deep conversations, and laughing at the others' jokes. We still go there, whenever the mood strikes us... and every time we leave, I still have the same initial reaction of what might of been me falling in love with him.

Currently listening to: "Four Winds" - Bright Eyes

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Mushy and gushy love post.

Short post today, I have only one thing to say:

Being in love is so... great. You stumble, you fall, but when you're with someone who matters.. you'll be picked back up again. And it's the greatest feeling ever, to be picked up again.

Unrelated note: check out my wonderful boyfriend's blog at:
http://www.thadsemporium.com


Currently listening to: Lua by Bright Eyes.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Memory holding pavement...

I realized today as I walked off my school bus, down the road I live on to my house that i've been doing this exact same motion since I was in Kindergarten.

It's amazing how things have changed.

What sparked my notice of this was that a piece of the sidewalk had cracked off and was laying in my neighbor's yard. I looked down on an instinct, and there it was. A chunk of pavement. My mind immediately alerted me as if saying, "Hey.. that wasn't like that before."

As I looked at that pavement my mind flooded with memories. Mainly of when I was a little kid and that front sidewalk against the main road was off-limits to me unless my mother was in the front yard. And even then, I was only allowed up to where the pavement turned from white cement to black top (the piece of cement that cracked off was a piece of the black top)because that's where my mother's line of sight would end.

Since I've been going to school, i've walked down the same sidewalk and up the same side street to reach the safety of my house. In Kindergarten until about 5th grade, I probably sprinted up that sidewalk as fast as my little legs would carry me. From 6th grade to 10th, I walked home with a bit of a spring in my step. Now, at the age of 17 and quickly finishing my last year of high school I practically have to drag myself off the bus and to my house, only to unlock the door and collapse into my kitchen as if my day in school had completely exhausted me.

I miss being little, I miss sprinting down that sidewalk... I miss going outside and just running around with my brother until it got dark and hearing my father yell "AMY AND ADAM, IT'S TIME TO COME IN!!!!" as loud as he could, to be sure we'd hear it no matter how far away we are.

I kicked that piece of sidewalk on my way to my house today, and it reminded me of a game we all would play while walking the streets; kick pebbles as far as you could up the road. And suddenly, I really wished it was acceptable for me to sprint to my house with all the speed I could muster without looking like a freak.


Currently listening to: "Trouble" - NeverShoutNever!